Switching clocks...

So this is what it's like to blog on a night shift.



This has been an outright crazy, frustrating, and bewildering week. At the beginning, I thought I was going to be a homeowner, but now, at the end, I'm wondering if my family is ever going to be the same. It just doesn't make sense.


My mother sent me an email to say that I shouldn't quit, I should just "not let anyone rush me". Poor, helpless Kar. I responded with a long email that I thought was objective and outlined what happened that made me cry. Then I got another email calling my response a "bitter little diatribe" and "I'm sorry that you hate us so much".

Now I know that I have an outstanding capacity for putting my foot in my mouth, but could I have really been that abrasive? No money has been spent (or lost), and although I may have given up a little prematurely, I felt that at the time it was going to end up being divisive if I continued on to purchase. I guess it would've been, either way. I realize now, safely out of the bounds of purchase, that had I actually gotten the house, I'd have ended up with a sizeable bill to rewire the house to support four computers and a television possibly all being turned on at the same time. It would've ended up being a bit of a nightmare. Even if it did have a great backyard and plenty of room....

So now I'm looking at something a little newer. I'm talking to my friend's dad about starting the hunt over again at the end of March, and I'm getting used to the idea of being slightly out of town. R-Bel and J-Bel are coming up to help me look, and I feel a little bit silly not having a clue where we're all going to live. I suppose we'll spend part of the day driving around to look at the houses we've found via the internet.

As for my family, I don't know what to think. Part of me feels guilty for being so hasty and possibly whining a bit in email form, but the other side of me is still indignant that the squabble has come to this. I chose not to reply, and I'm not going to communicate until everyone cools off. It still stings that the appearance of our last phone call was that they didn't think I had done any preparing for such a huge purchase and that I was completely naieve. It hurts. I'm optimistic that in a month and a half from now, when I go home for my brother's wedding, that it will all have been put behind us. I'll just...wait it out.

If I've missed the point, I'm still missing it.